When the Honeymoon is Over

There are those moments in life when it hits you hard… that “what am I doing here?” moment. It doesn’t typically come out of nowhere. There are little signs here and there. But there is usually that one defining moment somewhere in there that you realize that you have crossed a line.

In my case, it really started before the wedding. Maybe it was when he said not to dust his apartment while he was gone, because if he could see the dust marks, he wouldn’t have to get the tape ensure out and calculate the mathematical formulas to determine the precise spot in which to put each of his items. Or it may have been that he was over an hour late to the rehearsal the night before our wedding. Either way, it was clear early on, but I am stubborn.

There are honeymoon periods for other things in your life. You can love love love your new car right up until the fourth major safety recall that they will fix in six months when they manufacture enough parts. Meanwhile, be sure not to park near structures or sources of fuel, as your vehicle may be prone to spontaneous combustion.

Or maybe it was the job, that moment when you realized that for every 100 really awesome things you did, that one thing they never included in the manual that you didn’t handle the way they would have handled it is the thing that will haunt your personnel file to the end of your career

No matter how you look at things, life is a toilet, and at some point the cesspool will back up and you’re going to have shit on your hands. So dig out the mops and the bleach and the plunger, and learn to recognize when you are in over your head.

That’s why plumbers get the big bucks.


Look who’s on clearance?!


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