I said “What What?”

Note: Topic not safe for kids or work or any of that stuff, though there are no nude pics.

Have you ever noticed that a few missing letters can make someone’s IQ instantly appear significantly lower? Think about it… When someone writes “UR” instead of “you’re” or “your,” you assume that their educational background is probably sketchy.

It’s not that I’m a grammar Nazi… Okay, maybe I am a little. I realize my punctuation is stylistically sketchy on many of my posts. I try to adopt a style similar to a speaking voice, and sometimes that means ending sentences with prepositions, or the overuse of ellipses. I try not to be that obnoxious person who calls people out, because let’s face it, in the age of Smartphones, it’s all too easy to have some bizarre auto-corrections or misspellings from hitting the wrong key on that teeny, tiny phone keyboard. I often swear that my Galaxy is sentient. Adam tested his – it was able to search and find gay porn on voice command. (Yes, that’s the sort of thing we do when we’re bored. Don’t judge. You wouldn’t be able to read about a certain adult theater from the comfort of your own home if we weren’t such nut jobs.)

Then, there has been a photograph making the Facebook rounds all week, so I know I’m not the only one to find these things amusing:

Anal Egg Hunt

Again, two letters can make such a huge difference.

Here’s the funny thing… we know someone who had to go on a real, actual “Anal egg hunt.”

We’ll call him “Jerry,” and it was his girlfriend, “Jane” who told us the story. Apparently, Jerry was kind of a kinky guy. One day, Jerry was playing with an anal egg. Yes, that is a thing… No, I’ve never seen one, but I’m sure someone can do a quick Google Image Search and have their childhood destroyed forever… Anyway, the thing has some sort of string attached, so that when you’re done playing with it (and it vibrates, I think…) you can pull it back out, tampon style.

The problem was that when Jerry tried to get the vibrating egg out, the string broke. Fortunately, they were able to avert a very embarrassing trip the the emergency room by digging it back out. So yes, an actual “anal egg hunt.” But I’m pretty sure that wasn’t what the Lakewood Springs Homeowners Association had in mind with their sign, especially since the event is described as a “Free Family Event.” No. Just no.

Last week, we bought a “confetti cake” from Walmart. A missing letter “E” in the label made a few of us do a double take:

buttr creme cake
Do you see what I see? We all misread it at first.

Oh. It’s supposed to say “Butter creme.” Ah, much better.

Now, let’s all go read “Eats, Shoots and Leaves” and remember the importance of grammar as well.

Spelling and grammar, folks – they really are important. Without them, we all go around singing Samwell songs.

Yes, I absolutely love this video.

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